Funny Jokes Short Text Messages. ( 177 )

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65. I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.
66. I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
67. I like Kids. But I don't think I could eat a whole one.
68. I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.
69. I only have SEX on days that begin with T: Thanksgiving. Tuesday. Thursday. Today. Tomorrow. Thaturday. thunday.. Tevery day!
70. I only use de-oudourant under one arm, so I know what I would have smelled of.
71. I think drinking and driving is terrible. You always spill it when you change gears...
72. I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
73. I want to suck you.. lick you.. wanna move my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep, tat's how u...eat an ice cream!
74. I want to suck you... lick you... wanna move my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep, tat's how u...eat an ice cream!
75. I'M AN ALIEN. I HAVE JUST TRANSFORMED MYSELF INTO THIS TEST. AS YOU ARE READING I'M HAVING SEX WITH YOUR EYEBALLS. I KNOW THAT YOU LIKE IT BECAUSE YOU ARE SMILING
76. I'm late for work because the train driver had an out of body experience and didn't come back for a day and a half.
77. I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain. No pain.
78. I've got the ship, you've got the harbor ... what say we tie up for the night?
79. I've used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.
80. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.


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